Grow through suffering
In order to grow and improve as a person and generally be a better human, we must embrace suffering and use it daily to succeed.
“We suffer more in imagination than reality,”
Seneca
Have you ever wondered what it really means to be human? If you have, it was likely that you did it whilst sitting in a warm heated room, wearing fashionable clothes, drinking a sugar-filled latte and whilst in front of a computer. However, whatever it does mean to be human, it probably isn’t that. Or is it? Is it truly human to be comfortable all the time, tapping away on our laptops doing stuff that didn’t exist a mere century ago?
I recall a colleague of mine a few years ago who was doing a spine race across the Pennines in the UK which is one of the world’s most gruelling endurance races. He said that at one point during the race, after miles of cross country running and almost no sleep, his body started to shut down to focus just on surviving and keeping going. His vision blurred, his hearing went. But he said: ‘I just felt so human.’
And it’s true, whilst I’m not an endurance racer myself although I do get my yearly Spartan Races in, when you speak to people and from my own personal experience, you feel most human, when either suffering or out in nature. Maybe it was after hiking up a mountain and standing at the peak, looking out over the landscape. Or it was after a particularly gruelling workout where you’re lying on the floor, just concentrating on breathing and recovering.
The sad thing is, that a large percentage of the population, at least here in the west that is, don’t experience either of these feelings anywhere near enough, if at all. We all seek comfort, whether is the warmth of being indoors or maybe it’s the STOP button on the treadmill that you hit just when things start to get juicy. It could even be the snack cabinet you reach into when you’re only the slightly bit hungry.
Most of us avoid suffering.
And I believe that’s wrong. Suffering is innately human. In fact, whilst you’re sitting in front of your laptop reading this now, a large portion of the non-western world is suffering. Most of us here in the west, we’re weak; physically, mentally and spiritually. We lack grit, perseverance and self-control. When the going gets tough, we give up, or reach for a snack, or just break down.
What’s my take on it? Well, I believe that in order to grow, as a person, as a human, we need to suffer. We need to do the hard things. We need to seek discomfort. How you do it is up to you. I like to get up early and get to the gym when it opens at 6 am. It’s tough. My bed is warm and braving the cold outside on the 15-minute walk to the gym isn’t what I call fun. And then pushing myself to my limits in the gym is uncomfortable. But when I walk out of the gym, and currently on 20 Feb, it’s starting to get light now. It’s amazing. I’ve achieved something. I’ve grown. And I get to experience a small bit of nature’s greatest show on my walk home through the common. The sun comes up and the day begins.
On some days that could be the only time that I get outside. So I cherish it. And I’ve achieved more with my day by 7 am then a lot of people achieve by 7 pm. And for a brief moment. I felt human. I suffered. And I’m now a better person for it. I’ve grown mentally and physically stronger. I can now take on the day. And guess what. The harder you push yourself, the easier the rest of the day becomes. Whatever the day throws at you, it’s not as bad or painful as sitting at the bottom of the squat in your final set, fighting gravity and your own fatigue to stand back up.
What other forms of suffering do I use?
Maybe hitting the gym first thing isn’t your cup of tea. It should be, but who am I to judge. An easy way to suffer daily is through cold exposure. For most of us, that means a cold shower. Just the thought of it makes most people shiver. Such discomfort. Such suffering. But we all know the benefits, and if you don’t, maybe read my article on it that may or may not have been written yet depending on when you’re reading this. Otherwise, just google it. Or trust me. There are scientifically proven benefits to cold showing or other forms of cold exposure. I now do a full minute on the coldest setting my shower has, at the end of my nice and lovely warm shower. It’s not that bad. It not even that cold. It’s just uncomfortable. But you learn to love it. And you’ve suffered a bit. And with just a minute a day, you’ve become more human. You’re closer to being a human then you will be all day. It’s also likely the hardest thing you’ll do all day. Ask most people if they’d rather have their boss shout at them, skip a meal, get stuck in traffic, write a 6000-word essay, insert other difficult tasks or things that happen to you here, OR have a 1 minute cold shower, they would choose the former.
One final word on suffering. It’s extremely humbling. There’s not much room for ego when suffering. As I think we can all agree that that’s a good thing once in a while.
That’s enough rambling from myself, but if you want to learn more about real human suffering, then I’d suggest you read Victor Frankl’s Man’s search for meaning. And also Seneca and other Stoic philosophers.
“Fire tests gold, suffering tests brave men.”
Seneca
Find out more about Stoicism here: https://medium.com/@Coffee.Whisky.Barbells.and.B/01-why-im-a-stoic-and-you-should-be-too-2e317eda6536
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This article was written by Stuart Munnich. If you’d like to know more or receive notifications for future articles, please head over to the Agoge Project Website or subscribe to updates right here!
